Our Glorious History, Part The Last

<umu> So can you give a succinct account of the new calendar, its months, its days, and its relationship with the final day? I want to somehow get myself set up here to be cognizant of how it's all going down.

<grisom> Aight.

THE YEAR begins on the day of the Winter Solstice (Delphi time, i.e. GMT+1.5 hours) and ends on the day before the next Winter Solstice. It has 365 or 366 days. Because the start of the year is determined by events in the natural world, there is no simple algorithm for determining which years are leap years. Because of the vagaries of the Gregorian calendar, the true year may start anywhere between 20 December and 23 December, but I think it's usually 21 December.

The year beginning on the Gregorian date 21 December 2012 is Year 0. The years following it are numbered 1, 2, 3, etc. The years before Year 0 are given negative numbers. All years, even the negative ones, are considered to be part of the reign of Our Terrible Lord. Therefore the year number is preceded by the initials A.E.D., meaning Anno Excoriati Domini "In the Year of Our Lord the Flayed One".

THE MONTHS:
There are twelve months of exactly thirty days each, plus an extra five or six days at the end of the year when evil spirits roam free.

Each month has two names, based on the closest corresponding months in the French Republican and Ancient Egyptian calendars. Here are the names, with the most commonly corresponding Gregorian dates*. I am not completely certain about the Egyptian correspondences here. They are based on the idea that the month of Thoth was originally meant to start on the 20th of July.

Nivôse/Mshir: 21 December - 19 January
Pluviôse/Parmhotp: 20 January - 18 February
Ventôse/Parmoute: 19 February - 20 March
Germinal/Pashons: 21 March - 19 April
Floréal/Paone: 20 April - 19 May
Prairial/Epip: 20 May - 18 June
Messidor/Mesore: 19 June - 18 July
Thermidor/Thout: 19 July - 17 August
Fructidor/Paope: 18 August - 16 September
Vendémiaire/Hathor: 17 September - 16 October
Brumaire/Koiak: 17 October - 15 November
Frimaire/Tobe: 16 November - 15 December

The Uayeb: 16-20 December

THE WEEK: Each month can be subdivided into three ten-day weeks. I'm not convinced that it is especially useful to have names for the days of the week in this system, but if necessary we can use the Republican names: primidi, duodi, tridi, quartidi, quintidi, sextidi, septidi, octidi, nonidi, décadi.

THE CURRENT DATE is 10 Nivôse-Mshir -4 10 Prairial-Epip A.E.D. –4.

THE END/BEGINNING OF THE WORLD will occur on 1 Nivôse-Mshir 0.

Footnote:

* i.e. the equivalent dates when the year starts on 21 December and neither the Gregorian year nor the cult year are leap years.

Our Glorious History, Part VII

Parto de serio jam baldaŭ finiĝonta!

<grisom> The true year, of course, began 10 days ago and is the -4th year of the reign of Our Lord Xipe Totec.

<grisom> Umu, how would you say "Year of [Our] Lord The Flayed One" in Latin?

<umunmutamku> Aha, got it. excoriatus. So anno excoriati domini.

<grisom> *Awesome*. :)

Our Glorious History, Part VI

<grisom> I've decided that not even Jesus can alter the navel of the world. However, it is conceivable that the world's navel will relocate when the world is reborn four years from now. Hopefully the new location, if any, will become obvious at that time.

<grisom> Oh! Almost forgot: One key thing that I do not know is when a day starts. The Western world has for the past while started the day at midnight; the Jews (and, I think, Muslims) start the day at sundown; I think much of East Africa starts the day at sunrise. I have no idea what the Mayans and Egyptians did.

<grisom> As I mentioned earlier: When does the day start and end?

"The Jewish day begins at either sunset or at nightfall (when three second-magnitude stars appear). Medieval Europe followed this tradition, known as Florentine reckoning: in this system, a reference like "two hours into the day" meant two hours after sunset and thus times during the evening need to be shifted back one calendar day in modern reckoning."
"The Islamic and Jewish weekdays begin at sunset."

"In ancient Egypt, the day was reckoned from sunrise to sunrise."

"Present common convention is for the civil day to begin at midnight."
"According to Slavic folklore, midnight was time when strzygas rose from graves to suck the blood of mortals, zmoras assailed the sleeping to steal their breath, and devils came for sinners. Polish Jews believed that it was the time when dybbuks possessed people, causing insanity."

<umunmutamku> YES

<grisom> *stares* Okay, I... didn't realize this would be such an easy choice. :)

Unless there are any objections, then, I say the day of the winter solstice, and the leap year, is determined by MIDNIGHT at the DELPHI MERIDIAN. This turns out to be *checks* an offset of almost exactly one and a half hours from GMT. Which, magically enough, is halfway between the time zones of France and Egypt.

<umunmutamku> So when Itzpapalotl leads the tzitzimime in a swarm down from the cracks in the sky, it'll presumably happen at exactly midnight. :)

<grisom> Ew. What?

Our Glorious History, Part V

More More More!

<grisom> One interesting result of a strictly solstice-based calendar is that, since solstice is a moment in time rather than an actual day, it becomes significant what time zone is used to adjust the calendar year. The above Uayeb calculation is true only for time zones east of Alberta (and west of the International Date Line).

So! There are different ways of approaching this:

a) Every time zone could do their own slightly different calendar.
b) We could establish a reference time zone for the calendar.
c) We could establish a simple mathematical approximation of the wandering solstice similar to what the Gregorian calendar does with leap years.

I'm partial to (b),

<umunmutamku> I, too.

<grisom> but I'm not sure what time zone would be appropriate. Any thoughts?

<umunmutamku> Well, my first inclination would be the navel of the world—Delphi. But it is my understanding that Jesus destroyed Delphi (or something like that),

<grisom> HEE

<umunmutamku> so perhaps someplace new is now the center of the world.

<grisom> Well, we are getting this calendar from the following sources:
- Egypt
- France
- Maya... um... land

Any of these time zones work with the empirically-established Uayeb, but they are, y'know, not the same.

<grisom> (I'm just assuming here that the Gestalt forbids the reference time zone to be that of Alberta ;))

Our Glorious History: An Interlude

<grisom> the Persians have the most accurate calendar in the world. It has an error of about one day every three thousand years.

<grisom> Correction: The Persians have the most accurate calendar in the world. It has an error of about one day every THIRTY thousand years.

Our Glorious History, Part IV

La quatrième partie d'une série de longueur indéterminée.

<grisom> Umu! More hellworms!
I know how to convert between the Gregorian and Coptic calendars, but I also know that the Coptic calendar has drifted rather far from the year-start originally intended by the Ancient Egyptians. When did the Egyptian calendar start *when it was invented*?

<umunmutamku> PRELIMINARY WIKIPEDIAING (i am at school and write hastily from a business-bldg computer) seems to indicate the year started with the heliacal rising (?) of the star Sirius.

<grisom> I know!

Supposedly the "heliacal rising" was an astronomical proxy for a certain point in the Nile's flood cycle, which presumably occurs on a specific date in our current calendar. The original Egyptian calendar was exactly 365 days every year, so it got badly out of sync with the Nile by the time it was Romanized into the Coptic calendar. The Coptic calendar itself, with its Julian leap years, has gone even further out of whack since then. So what I want to know, put more precisely, is: If the Coptic calendar were still in sync with the Nile, on what Gregorian date would the Coptic year begin?

(My purpose in all this is to figure out how to line up the Coptic and French Republican month names, of course.)

<grisom> July 20th! Okay, actually that's a Julian date, but it probably doesn't matter too much. This would mean we are currently in Nivose-Meshir.

Our Glorious History, Part III

Part of a series!

<umumuntamku> Is there any way this could be further aligned with the Mayan "vague year," which is vaguely similar?

<grisom> Only if you explain it!

<grisom> *looks it up*

<umumuntamku> *gets back from the shower*

I'm glad you did that, because I have no idea where my Native American Mathematics book is right now. Probably buried pretty deep.

<grisom> 18*20, eh? Yeah, the Mayans *would* do it that way, wouldn't they?

Well:
- I'm not feelin' a change from the 12*30 system, which has the support of Ancient Egypt, the Gnostic Christians, and the French Republic, all of whom are officially Cool.

<umumuntamku> Indeed, I am in agreement with you here.

<grisom> - Kinda interesting that the days of the months are numbered 0-19 rather than 1-20.
- "Bricker (1982) estimates that the Haab' was first used around 550 BCE with the starting point of the December winter solstice." WIN

<umumuntamku> Hm!

<grisom> 'The five nameless days at the end of the calendar called Wayeb' were thought to be a dangerous time. Foster (2002) writes "During Wayeb, portals between the mortal realm and the Underworld dissolved. No boundaries prevented the ill-intending deities from causing disasters." To ward off these evil spirits, the Maya had customs and rituals they practiced during Wayeb'.'

I RECOMMEND that we accept the notion that the Uayeb is a time when evil deities prowl the streets, but that we consider that AWESOME.

<tezcatlipoca> I agree with all of this (:

<umumuntamku> Uhm... aren't we... coming up on the Uayeb, like, *immediately*? That would be December 27–31, right? *anxious look*

<grisom> No, if the year ends on the solstice we have already passed the Uayeb in safety :)

<umumuntamku> ...

Wait, have I been suffering the ill effects of the Uayeb? Is that why I've felt so horrible recently? When did it happen? When is the solstice?

<grisom> 21 December, so the Uayeb would've been approximately 16-21 December.

<umumuntamku> The 16th of December, Tuesday, was *exactly* when I first started falling ill—I remember this because my body began to feel withered and dead immediately after my Greek exam that day—and the 21st, Saturday, was *exactly* when I stopped feeling like I had some horrible disease—I remember this because Clair arrived that day, and I was relieved to find that I no longer felt unable to move.

On this basis, I propose that the period of 16–20 December was in fact the Uayeb, and the Uayeb was the reason I fell ill. I failed to protect myself against the spirit attacks that I am apparently especially susceptible to.

<grisom> Interesting!

<grisom> Hmm... Well, that does correlate with whatsisface's idea that the Haab' started *on* the Solstice, but I'll have to figure out how to square this with the idea that the last day of the world is (I think) on the solstice. If the 2012 solstice is actually Dec. 22 we have it made. Otherwise I'll have to figure out some kind of justification.

<umumuntamku> *uses a calendar converter*

The last day should be the solstice? Well, do you feel that the last day will be 12.19.19.17.19 or 0.0.0.0.0? Those will be Dec 20 and Dec 21, respectively.

<grisom> I'm told the last day is 13.0.0.0.0.

<umumuntamku> Aight. Then why do we want the 2012 solstice to be on the 22nd? Shouldn't it be on the 21st?

<grisom> Okay:
1. You say your spirit-sickness ended on the solstice, and that therefore the Uayeb was the five days *before* the solstice
2. The Uayeb being the end of the year, that makes the solstice the first day of the next year
3. The last day of this world's existence should be the last day of the year; that was the whole point to begin with
4. But if the end is actually *on* the solstice, and the solstice is the first day of the new year, then something in the above three points has to give.

<umumuntamku> Well, inre: 3, I question that—isn't the last day, 13=0.0.0.0.0, actually the first day of the new year?

<grisom> ...
Yes!

<umumuntamku> The end (which is, after all, just the beginning) takes place in the new year.

<grisom> You are an occult genius.

<umumuntamku> This would make it possible to have the solstice be the 21st, not to mention reaffirm my health-based assessment of the period of the Uayeb. :)

<grisom> Hurray!

<umumuntamku> Well, it's annoying that I have become enough of a brujo that this affects me. I suppose I will have to start adopting the Uayeb ritual practices every year. These apparently include not leaving the house and not combing one's hair, so, uh, I think I can handle it.

Our Glorious History, Part II

<grisom> Umu! Any idea how the Ancient Egyptians named the ten days of their week?

<umunmutamku> Holy shit, Griz, did you ever just crack open a can of blood-hungry hell worms.

Yeah. Egyptian dates are fucked up the bronze ass hole, though, Griz.

<grisom> My understanding was that the Egyptians invented the French Republican Calendar, to wit: that their year was 12 months of 30 days each, plus a five-day "little month" at the end, and that they had a ten-day week; furthermore that the start of the year was based on something Sirius was doing in the sky, which went slowly out of sync with what the Sun was doing.

<umunmutamku> Okay. The year divides into 12 months (3bd) and 3 seasons: 3ḫt "inundation," prt "winter," šmw "summer." Each season had four months of thirty days, and there were five "epagomenal" days to round it all out.

Dates begin with the "regnal year" sign ḥ3t-sp and a numeral. Next up: the month position in the season cycle, e.g. 3bd 2 3ḫt "second month of inundation." The last value is the date position in the month, sw, followed by a numeral.

The first month of the season is not usually written 3bd 1 XXX but rather tpy XXX "first of XXX." Similarly, the last day of the month is written ʕrqy without sw, meaning something like "end."

The date is always followed by the royal titulary, since the date is dependent on the current regime. The bare minimum is something like: "under the Majesty of the King of Upper and Lower Egypt (name in cartouche)—may he be given life!" (ḫr ḥm n(y) nsw-bity (name) ʕnḫw) The full titulary is excruciatingly long, consisting of five different names and a whole series of formulas.

So in conclusion: we must reckon only with Ancient Egyptian seasons, not month or day names (those are lost),

<grisom> I don't see why you say the month names are lost, though, since the Coptic Christians still call their months by names like "Thoth" and "Hathor". Is there any reason *not* to think that they're using the original Egyptian names?

<umunmutamku> *stares, blinks*

Jesus, you're right. No, they very obviously are.

<grisom> Success!

<umunmutamku> ...and must incorporate the royal titulary somehow.

<grisom> Oh, I'm not aiming to emulate the Ancient Egyptian year-numbering system, I just wanted better day-names than the French "oneday, twoday, threeday". But if those are lost to the sands then SCREW ANCIENT EGYPT.

<umunmutamku> Heh. But how about it? We could pick some symbolic ruler. :)

<grisom> Well, the main impetus for this calendar was to have the year-counting system centred around the end of the world on Dec 21, 2012. So as long as you can keep that property...

Our Glorious History, Part I

<grisom> I propose that we institute a new calendar where the year ends on the Winter Solstice. That way, the end of the world and the end of the year will coincide nicely. It is also appropriate, I think, that the year should begin on the day when things get LESS sucky.

<tezcatlipoca> second, but mostly because I'm a big fan of as much change as possible. which is also why I'm not "conservative".

<grisom> Also propose numbering years from the date of the end of the world. So, like, today would be the first day of the year 3... uh... B.E. (Before the Eschaton) or something.

<grisom> It seems natural that our calendar should otherwise be identical to the Coptic/French Republican system. But how should the months be named?

<tezcatlipoca> ooh ooh ooh! I love the republican system (but I don't know why)

<tezcatlipoca> as long as we can keep Thermidor, and Brumaire, I'm fine with all the other, uh, months (?) being more coptically themed...